Dear John, I Love Jane: Women Write About Leaving Men for Women by Laura Andre

Author:Laura Andre [Andre, Laura]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Biography & Autobiography, Gay & Lesbian, Lgbt, Family & Relationships, General, Divorce & Separation, Interpersonal Relations, Marriage, Marriage & Long Term Relationships, Psychology, Human Sexuality, Self-Help, Sexual Instruction, Social Science, Women's Studies, Essays
ISBN: 9781580053846
Google: tx3cWuE6arUC
Publisher: Seal Press
Published: 2010-10-18T16:00:00+00:00

After a lengthy and dramatic fallout, my friend and I are still in each other’s lives; in fact, we are best friends. We scraped and clawed our way back to each other and we are proud of what we have reestablished. We created comfortable boundaries and we see each other often and talk many times a day. I have moments of confusion when I look at her romantically, but those pop-ups are few and far between. The depth and satisfaction of our current friendship is worth more than any fling we could have that might threaten it. I still feel a different kind of intimacy with her than I do with my other friends. My other friends and I are very close, intimate, and affectionate, but I have never crossed the romantic line with any of them.

On the outside, not much changed. I didn’t make any drastic physical changes. I locked my hair, but I had been working toward that for years. I was still most comfortable in sweats, jeans, and T-shirts. I was no stranger to heels and a short skirt either. Strappy heels and new wedges still excited me just as new tennis shoes did. I looked forward to the latest makeup colors. I coordinated my purses with my mood. I wore makeup as needed and rarely went without lipstick and earrings.

Inside, a part of me still wavered about whether my changing sexuality was sparked because of who she was, as my friend, or because she was a woman. I do still desire women and I am open to them romantically. I am just as choosy with women as I am with men. The integrity of whom I choose to date is still just as high. If there’s no chemistry, there’s no match. And if I’m not treated well, they won’t last long. Dissecting the dynamics of my sexual spark has become less important to me over time. I am comfortable with where I am now.

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